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Quarter of a Century- A Birthday Post

I thought today deserved a blog entry. 25 years old, going on 50. After I turned 18, I didn’t really care about my birthday until I turned 21. I turned 21, and now I really could care less about my birthday. Funny how that happens as you get older. Soon, I will be dreading my birthday. 30 isn’t going to be fun. I really don’t ever think about my age. Kind of like my name, I don’t see it as a defining factor on who I am as a person. Maybe that is how everyone is, I don’t know. Your “wants” change too. I used to want the coolest new gadget, or new clothes, or makeup, or a car. Now a card is lovely and a phone call or Facebook message from friends or family means the world. Pots and pans…now we are talking. I desperately needed new pots and pans, as I was still using my set from college and the black coating was starting to make its way into my meals. Not healthy. My parents got me a great all-clad set, and I ordered a hanging rack to hang them up on display in our kitchen. Awesome gift.

Birthdays seem to be a childhood sentiment. Parents throw these big parties (me being one of them) and shower gifts on their children…all because they were born. The child doesn’t know any different. They get to have all their friends there, cake and ice cream, and all the toys they could ever want or find the time to play with. It never really dawned on me until I became a parent on the true meaning of celebrating birthdays. It is more about the parent celebrating the child that they always wanted, and the day that they welcomed them into their lives. I totally get it. I want to celebrate with full force the anniversary of the day Lula entered this world and stole the hearts of Ryan and I. Stole the hearts of our family and friends. I celebrate her every day, but that day…we are going to party like crazy on that day.

Like I said before, I haven’t really sat and thought about my birthdays. Thought about if I am happy with where this past year has taken me, what I have accomplished, and what I have learned. For some reason, maybe because I have been trying to have more insight in my life, I have been thinking about it this time around. Maybe it’s because I am halfway to 50…and that’s weird. I am the type of person who likes to think of the future. Likes to try new things, push myself, and work hard. If I put my mind to something, I almost always do it. I don’t like to feel too comfortable, and the idea of just being settled makes me feel a little uneasy. I am a risk-taker and a lover of life, so I guarantee you, I will always be in the works of something, learning something new, or planning and dreaming about my future. The way I see it, life is too short to just be “settled”. I don’t want to miss a thing. BUT. I have already, by the time I am 25, accomplished my life-long goal. Out of every business venture, personal adventure, education-goal that I talk about doing, plan on doing, or have already done--the ONE thing that I wanted to accomplish that I believed would define my life as a success was to be a wife and a mother. And, I am both of those things. Some days I am a shitty wife, or a lazy mom. But overall, by a huge margin, I am rocking those two things. If I don’t do anything else in my life, I will be completely satisfied. Being able to say that with absolute honesty is a great feeling. Maybe that is a huge milestone for me. I have found balance in my life that I haven’t had before. Balance between wanting and being content with what I have. I will continue to want to experience life, try new things, take risks, and reach new goals…but I am so content, so happy, and so overly satisfied with what I have and where I am in life. I think maintaining this balance is really going to keep me moving, but keep me really grounded and present in life at the same time. And I like that.

As far as the number thing goes…my parents tell me that I have always been an old soul. I preferred to talk with the adults as opposed to playing with the kids. I hated the “kids table” at Thanksgiving. I wanted boobs when I was 3. Cried about it, actually. Prayed to God that I would get my period, so I was truly considered a woman. (Little did I know, getting my period wasn’t all roses and womanliness and blossoming….it’s anything but). I truly think that I was made that way for a reason though. Life happened and I was forced to have to grow up quick. My childhood was different from a lot of kids. At the time, I didn’t view it as a horrible thing. I was happy to have to put on my big girl pants and take on responsibility. In retrospect, it’s never good for a kid to miss out on being a kid, BUT because of my maturity as a child, it made me very capable of stepping up in tough times without a lot of psychological damage. Then, later on, I made a lot of decisions that made me grow up fast. I had a serious boyfriend the majority of high school, partied like it was my job, actually had a pretty grown up job for a high schooler…then I got married at 22, had a kid at 23, will have 2 by 25… a lot of my friends are older as I seem to have more in common with them…part of me just wants to slow down. Maybe not get any older for awhile. I think I am going to just enjoy being 25, so much so that I may just be 25 for a couple more years… ;)

Overall, I am so happy with my first 25 years of life. I look back and remember fond memories as opposed to bad ones. I have love and respect for my parents that I didn’t have before. I have wonderful friendships that run deep. I have a beautiful daughter, and another on the way. My husband is my best friend. My family is healthy and we have a home and food to eat. What more could I ask for on my birthday? My wishes have already come true.


And finally, I'd like to share a picture I got on my Facebook wall from one of my dear friends, Scott... You're Welcome.